Things you learn the hard way. Please contribute.

[the skipper]

I'll start:

1) Never mount the hummingbird feeder near the bug zapper.

Next?

 

[highvoltage_]

Probably won't happen much anymore since CRTs are mostly gone, but be careful measuring the high voltage input to a color television tube. Got zapped (hence my username).

 

[stevo137]

I can't drink hard liquor, it can turn me into a mean bastard.

 

[zebra03]

Never flip a guy off wearing a mitten . It's just a wave .

 

[dcmfan]

When she says "It's fine, don't worry about it."

Worry about it because it's NOT fine.

 

[SolderIron]

I will tighten the nut just a bit more.
It is good enough ----(It is most of the time).
Love and marriage is not for life. It is a temporary feeling and contract.

 

[Ronald1973]

Know someone for more than a month and ten days before you marry them!

 

[motorstereo]

Never touch the speaker wires of 2 running amps together.

 

[Johnno_Oz]

Don't delay in seeing a doctor when a medical problem seems to be getting worse.

There was a small ward full of us "brave men" with the same story, we didn't want anyone to worry about us.

 

[RichPA]

If it feels broken, it probably is.

 

[Cactus Bob]

That marriage is the leading cause of divorce.

 

[eiraved]

Habanero peppers are just as hot coming out as going in.

 

[petehall347]

life on planet earth ..

 

[grillebilly]

If you can't look past things that rub you the wrong way than you best keep to yourself.

 

[jcamero]

If it ain't broke, don't fix it until it's broke.

 

[MaxxVolume]

Unless you see a baby crawling out from between her legs, never ask a woman if she`s pregnant !

 

[dyche01]

Better to be alone than stuck with the wrong person.

 

[MaxxVolume]

While at the bar the other night, I overheard three very hefty women talking.
Their accent appeared to be Scottish, so I approached and asked, "Hello, are you three lassies from Scotland?"
One of them angrily screeched, "It's Wales, Wales you bloody idiot!"
So I apologized and replied, "I am so sorry. Are you three whales from Scotland?"
And that's the last thing I remember.

 

[doodledog]

If you're falling off the step-stool, let go of the light fixture.

 

[SolderIron]

Buy good quality toilet paper.