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Funny Ol Sayings

Oh --this is great!! I have heard some sayings I haven't heard in years!!
Keep em coming....
 
Three Days I Hate To See Again-----"Yesterday-Today-and-Tomorrow"~~~
Willie Nelson 1962
 
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Colder than an well-digger's destination.

Hotter than a fire cracker

Hotter than a hen in a wool basket

Tore up, from the floor up **pronounced: "To' up from th' Flo' up"

That dog'll hunt
 
If you can't run with the big dogs, stay on the porch

My own personal modification to the above is:
If you can't run with the big dogs, stay your puppy-ass on the porch
 
Make like a tree, and leaf.
Make like a baby, and head out.
Make like a pair of headlights, and hit the road.
 
''crazy as a shithouse rat ''[ because in the day of out houses and the friendly sears catalog, the rats frequenting the outhouse would chew on the ''paper'' which had a high mercury content-leading to brain damage and strange behavior] passed on from my grandfather.
 
You've got to be 10% smarter than the high end audio equipment you're runnin'.

Harder than stuff'n a stick of butter up a bobcat's ass with a red hot poker.

He'd bitch if you hung him with a new rope.
 
Darker than a welldigger's ass

From the Japanese corporate culture: nail that sticks up gets hammered flat

Might as well be hung for a sheep as a lamb (also better to be shot for a lion than slaughtered as a lamb)

Busier than a one-armed paperhanger (or a one legged man in an ass-kicking contest)

don't let the door hit you where the good lord split you


John
 
One of my own creation: "there is no right way to do something stupid"

In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king

If you don't have anything good to say, don't say anything at all'

Alternate: if you don't have anything good to say, come on in and sit a spell

No good deed goes unpunished


John
 
When all you have is a hammer - all your problems start to look like nails.

Life is just a bowl of toenails.

I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me, than a full frontal lobotomy.

I hate grils.
You mean 'girls' silly !
What about us grils ?
 
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