I suspect a number of the posters who have already responded may have read this, but if not-- a very extensive ramble on equalization, tone controls and related neat stuff:
http://www.roger-russell.com/equalizers/equalizers.htm
As someone who measured many actual room responses and programmed quite a few MQ104's and 107's and many non-Mac equalizers, I can attest that if you want to freak out an audiophile, just show him what his room is doing to the "flat" sound from his high end tone-control-less system.
Now, having said that, a few points I would like to make:
If your tone control system is significantly coloring the sound of your system, the controls are poorly designed. And yes, they often are. But they aren't inherently to blame. The effects of well-designed tone controls are very subtle, but if you are one of those who can hear that difference, purchase a preamp (or whatever) with bypassable controls. Real easy to do, electrically speaking.
The basic bass and treble controls on the typical preamp are very limited in that they often have too broad of an adjustment range, or turn over at poorly selected frequencies, or change the levels too severely, like those olden-timey ones that had like +/- 15 or 20dB boost/cut ranges! Eeesh!! 5 to 10 dB is way more like it. Look for controls that allow very fine adjustment, at least one dB at a time. Many times a dB or two in the right place is all that you need. Most people advance the controls way too far.
Within reason, a few more controls are better. Not a plug for McIntosh in particular, but I think their original setpoints for the C32, C33, C34 etc. were close to just about perfect for the five-band set of controls they sported. Some of their newer pres have eight controls, which I think is too many.
There is a deiiference between EQ's used for program correction ("what sounds right") and room correction. Program correction should not use more than 10 controls, like in an octave band equalizer. Room correction requires 1/3 octave correction at a minimum to do a proper job, and you must use test equipment to meaasure the room, average the various modes (account for different positions in the room) and once set, you forget it. You will find that with the room eq'd properly, your program controls, if used, will respond more accurately.
Almost lastly: As several others have commented, whatever sounds good to you is what's important. I do not have my listening room eq'd, and my preamp has three tone controls with center detents that take them electrically out of the circuit when not in use. I have a variable loudness control. Other than these amenities, the preamp is fairly "purist" in design. I have a large music collection, and if the recording calls for it, I use any of the above controls to make it sound more pleasing. If it doesn't, I don't.
Lastly: I have found that failing to obsess about small sonic details has made my music listening life happier. Good music, happy me.