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Vikingdom (2013) a Stupendously Rotten Viking movie

transmaster

transmaster

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I am a sucker for Viking, Norse Gods, Valhalla, Beowulf movies. Vikingdom is the worst I have ever watched, it is beyond horrible. Imagine Thor as a muscle bound oaf, Emo pink mono filament fishing line wig that looks like it came from Walmart after Halloween sale, a plastic hammer, who makes like a food processor, slices, chops, dices, purees, pokes, stabs, and makes Shish Kabobs out of poor the Irish (?) monks. The Abbot intones the standard line you hear in such movies, "This is a House of God you cannot do that here". Thor answers with the equally memorable line "I am a God". Eric the undead, or whatever, gets told by Frey another Norse God that looks like.......damn. :lmao: These "Vikings" wouldn't even look good in as a professional wrestlers. These are the sort of movies I keep expecting the "actors :confused:" to turn to the camera with the line, "what and give up show business". Did I mention the flesh eating Zombies. :D I am still watching, and I can't take much more. Remember the gold painted sweeties in Gold Finger, multiply that by 100. Can it get any worse................:scratch2: Oh I almost forgot you can see it on Netflix.

The soundtrack is very nice, much, much better the n the movie unavailable but nicely done by Edry A. Halim.

Thor God of Emo.
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A God of Asgard???????
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The best Viking movies are "The Vikings" (1958' Kirk Douglas and Tony Curtis) and "Alfred the Great" (1969, David Hemmings as Alfred and Michael York as Guthrum).
 
Tom Brennan said:
The best Viking movies are "The Vikings" (1958' Kirk Douglas and Tony Curtis) and "Alfred the Great" (1969, David Hemmings as Alfred and Michael York as Guthrum).
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As a teenager I thought the horn call on "The Vikings" 1958 was the coolest thing. I used to drive people crazy playing it on the Baritone I had at the time. The soundtrack by Mario Nascimbene is on the, I want it "list". There is a CD out that incorporates it but don't waste your money it is a rotten direct transfer and the sound quality sucks even worse then Vikingdom.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0052365/?ref_=nv_sr_1

If you want to see a Viking movie that is really good but really creepy, watch, Valhalla Rising (2009) it is one of those movies that you wish you had not started to watch but once you start you can't stop.
 
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Tom Brennan said:
The best Viking movies are "The Vikings" (1958' Kirk Douglas and Tony Curtis) and "Alfred the Great" (1969, David Hemmings as Alfred and Michael York as Guthrum).
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And don't forget Vivian Leigh in 'The Vikings'...hubba hubba! :D

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transmaster said:
If you want to see a Viking movie that is really good but really creepy, watch, Valhalla Rising (2009) it is one of those movies that you wish you had not started to watch but once you start you can't stop.
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Is that the one where they show a POV shot of the guy taking a dump. Up close and personal. Almost like they thought it was art. :yikes: I pretty much had to keep watching after that to see how much worse it could get. :D
 
VinylHanger said:
Is that the one where they show a POV shot of the guy taking a dump. Up close and personal. Almost like they thought it was art. :yikes: I pretty much had to keep watching after that to see how much worse it could get. :D
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There is another Viking movie that has this creepy edge to it. Hammer of The Gods (2013) also on Netflix. A Viking King is dying and he has several sons but he decides the way to pick his successor is for the sons to basically try to kill each other and the one left standing is the best qualified for job. One of the sons is sent out to find a brother who had been banished.
 
I enjoy a good Viking flick. None really sticks in my mind though except 13th warrior, mostly because of the delivery of the "battle prayer".

Prayer from the film "The 13th Warrior":

Lo, there do I see my father.
Lo, there do I see my mother.
And my sister and my brother
Lo, there do I see the line of my people
Back to the beginning.
Lo, they do call to me.
They bid me take my place among them
In the halls of Valhalla
Where the brave may live forever.
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Gots to impress the Valkyries though.

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Technically, She should be blond....
 
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