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Wal-Mart Greeter

Dan ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

Dan ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

Peanut Head
A very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walks into Wal-Mart with her two kids in tow, screaming obscenities at them all the way through the entrance. She's dressed in dirty jeans, a greasy t-shirt with holes in it and wearing flip-flops exposing her cracked and filthy toenails.
When she yells at the kids, she exposes her yellowed, crooked teeth with more than a few missing.

The Wal-Mart Greeter says, "Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart.
Nice children you've got there. Are they twins?"

The ugly woman stops screaming long enough to say, "Hell no they ain't!
The oldest one, he's 9 and the younger one, she's 7.
Why the Hell would you think they're twins? Do you really think they look alike?"
"No", replies the greeter, "I just couldn't believe someone had sex with you twice."
 
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I can only imagine what kind of crapola Wal-Mart greeters see all the time...and they gotta stand there & smile at it all. Most of 'em are older people, I bet they wonder wtf has happened to the world since they were kids...
 
If I HAVE to venture into a Wal-Mart I find that the greeters are the best people in the whole store. Just about everyone else is useless. I'll chat with the greeters for a few minutes and then go about my shopping and then say g'bye.
 
You can't stir 'em w/a stick in the Wal-Marts 'round here 1st of the month. That's when all The Great Unwashed get their checks, & they waste no little time getting rid of same. Immense, grossly obese women w/several snot-nosed kids in tow clog the aisles. You DO wonder "Who in the hell would be hard-up enuff to wanna sleep w/THAT?"
 
A Wally World Christmas

Have you heard that Wally World will be using roaming Santas in their store this year?

They'll be easy to spot; they're the skinniest guys in the store!

Doug
 
The greeter at our Wally is named Disco. I think he's trying to hit on my wife.:nono:
 
Walterworld

It's easy to knock Waldo's. I'd just as soon go to the dentist as WalMart. but:

1. You can get a haircut, oil change, groceries, & fishin' lures at the same time, at a reasonable price.

2. They hire old geezers who ain't got nothing going for them to be greeters, don't pay much, but it's better than pickin' s--- with the chickens.

3. They have their new $4.00 drug plan, I don't like a race to the bottom, but by God it does help the poor (not to mention Walmart).

4. I had a cousin go to work for them back when they were nothing, some kind of manager. He just kept plugging along, buying stock, now he's a millionaire. Wish I could say the same for myself.

Bottom line: Wally ain't perfect, their policies have helped (and hurt) a lot of people, besides, it's the wave of the future.

"The only thing constant is change" Aristotle.
 
As far as the greeters at the Wally World, it depends on the store. My town has three stores, in the immediate area, five total. The Wal-Mart near my home has one of the worst greeters in the whole town, they don't greet, they chit chat every time I visit. The others in the area have really good greeters, and I wonder how they cope with disrespectful people.

But the best time to see a greeter is when there's no greeter at all :D , and that's at 12:30 AM on some nights - just a chatty police officer.
 
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