• The move to the new server is done. There are some software and database maintenance updates in process. This has us passing the hat around to help out. We appreciate any donations. Seriously, even a dollar helps. The payment page may be found here - https://www.audiokarma.org/support.html

Deep breathing exercises

sKiZo

sKiZo

Hates received: 92644 43.20°N 85.50°W
Currently doing this in therapy, and it's actually quite relaxing. The scripts they use are kinda boring though, so I thought I'd seek unprofessional help here on a new one. I'll start ...

Breathe in slowly
Feel the cool air going through your nostrils
Ignore the nickel you shoved up your nose when you were five ...
 
Register to hide this ad
Unprofessional help, you say?

Breathe in slowly
Feel the cool air going through your nostrils
Ignore the aroma lingering from the person three spots over who ate beans and pickled herring yesterday....
 
Hold that breath until the gagging reflex becomes too much
While doing so, appreciate the heightened sensitivity that beans and herring can supply
Exhale slowly thru your mouth
Sharing the essense of your sardine and limburger sandwich with the world
 
According to Mr Peabody ...

ce3d37a78812c895745e4d4132f0eb14.jpg


Because Nickel (Ni) is ferromagnetic it is used in making Alnico magnets(consisting of aluminium, nickel, and cobalt). Note that the U.S. five cent coin called a “Nickel” is made of 75% copper and 25% Nickel (Ni). Even though it containsNickel (Ni), a ferromagnetic material, they aren't visibly attracted to magnets.

Then again, that might have been wiki, which is just about as accurate ...
 
Exhale until your lungs are empty
Suck in your stomach as much as you can
If as much as you can is a lot less than you once could
Think carefully about changing your diet
 
Breathe in deeply, breathe in the good...
Exhale the bad....
Try to ignore the urge to firebomb the shop that is holding your truck hostage and keeps finding new things to fix that have nothing to do with the problem they can't seem to fix.
Breathe in again.
 
Speaking of deep breathing..
A true story.

My father-in-law was a waiter earlier in his life and a group of people ranging in age from their late 60s to late 70's were dining in this restaurant and one of the women developed the hiccups.
So one of the older gentleman seriously discussed using a deep breathing technique and told her she must hold her breath, so she tried the technique with a couple of deep breaths and then held the last one and while she was holding the last one the older gentleman told her .....
Now BLOW IT OUT YOUR ASS !!!

My father-in-law herd this conversation going on while he was delivering to a table right next to these people .. and yes these people were drinking alcohol.... Everyone busted out laughing as did my father-in-law and he dropped the complete tray of food from laughing so hard.... He could not believe these older people had such a fun sense of humor and this older gentleman was quite the comedian.
 
I got into deep breathing and did it quite often to the point when I wasn't practicing deep breathing I found myself being overly self conscious of my breathing, a process you shouldn't have to think abouto_O
 
tubed said:
I got into deep breathing and did it quite often to the point when I wasn't practicing deep breathing I found myself being overly self conscious of my breathing, a process you shouldn't have to think abouto_O
Click to expand...

Now breathe out
Empty your lungs by pulling your stomach in tight
Hold that for a count of three
One .......... two ...........
thump thump breathe dammit!
(next time I should maybe count faster?)
 
Oh... you were the girl that was stuck to seat 38 on Phydeaux III... why don't you get in position now and take a deep breath, because this water is very very cold, but it's goin' to be so stimulating!
 
Last edited:
Strange detour, but I'll play ...

I hear she'd been there since Phydeaux II ... an EXTREMELY sticky situation it was, but FZ had the seat transferred to the new wheels. Kept us ALL glued to our seats wondering when the situation would be rectumfied ...

And ... let's not forget, as long as it's very very cold, we of the male persuasion can all blame it on shrinkage. Can't say for certain that works with the fairer sex ... maybe somebody can clarify?
 
Last edited:
sKiZo said:
Now breathe out
Empty your lungs by pulling your stomach in tight
Hold that for a count of three
One .......... two ...........
thump thump breathe dammit!
(next time I should maybe count faster?)
Click to expand...
Relax. Breathe in on 7 counts. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7.
Relax hold for a 20 count.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17181920.
Relax.
Breathe out on a 14 count.
12345678910111213.5.
Momentarily relax.
Repeat
No cheating
 
Breathe in slowly
savor the aroma of the pine forest you are in
bask in the calmness of the moment
exhale slowly, now you can swat that mosquito on you ear
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom