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Stupidest thing you ever heard from an audio salesguy?

Not audio related but – we were working with a co-location provider to lease cabinet space for the network equipment supporting our wireless ISP service. We knew they imposed a 3000 watt power consumption max for each cabinet, but just couldn’t get one of the cabinets below 3200 watts (max consumption for all hardware at full load – which would never happen). When we asked for special dispensation for the 200 wayward watts:

Colo Sales Rep: “You can’t do that, your equipment will melt!”

Us: “Uh….you mean trip a breaker, thermal shut off or something similar don’t you?”

Colo Sales Rep: “No, it will melt”

Us: “As in molten pools of Cisco routers and switches in the bottom of the cabinet?”

Colo Sales Rep: “Well…. something like that!”

At that point she seemed to realize how insane that sounded and said the EE would need to make that call. In an apparent attempt to convince us they were truly insane, the proposed resolution was that we could have the 3200 watts in that cabinet, but we would need to lease an unpowered cabinet so that the average over all cabinets was 3000 watts or less. That wasn’t an option at $1000 per month per cabinet powered or not.
 
stereolover said:
Hi JSTAS,
Years ago when I had long hair and a beard I decided I wanted to buy a
new car, a Fiat 124 sport coupe. I went to the local dealer in El Cajon CA.
and asked if I could take one for a test drive. The sales person looked at me as if I were nuts and gave me ten reasons why I couldn't drive this car. I had just received an insurance settlement and had the cash to cover the car.
I drove into San Diego and purchased the car I wanted from the dealer there. I then returned to the first dealer and asked to see the sales manager. BTW I asked the sales person that I had previously spoke to. He started to give me a load of bull about how I was bothering him and he would call the cops if I didn't leave. Well the "discussion" got a little loud when the owner appeared and wanted to know what the problem was. The sales guy started to tell him about this idiot hippie who wanted to joy ride one of their new cars. I interupted and asked the owner to step to the window to see something. I showed him the new Fiat that I had bought and explained why I went into SD to buy it and not from him. He went ballistic, fired the sales guy and offered to give me free service for my new car if I would bring it to him. I walked out without a backward glance and never went back.
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I had a similar experience when I bought my Lightning. Guy at oen dealer wouldn't give me the time of day. The guy at another dealer even offered me a coffee and a donut when I came in to see him. I bought the truck from guy number two and they even busted thier asses to find me the financing plan that i was looking for and a rate that was less than 6%. Later on I joined the SVTOA and the club was sponsed by the dealer with the guy who wouldn't help me. He was chastised by the showroom manager when the SM found out what I had to go through to get my black Lightning. I gladly take the truck in for service 'cause the service manager has treated me with nothing but kindness and respect but I'll buy vehicles from the other guy.
 
There was a Polk bookshelf speaker in there that was pretty abused. Someone apparently made many indentations on the cone and poked a hole right through its center. I made a comment about the damage and noted a constant buzzing coming from the speaker. My associate said with confidence "Its just a voice coil". I didn't even bother with that one...

Another time that sticks out in my head is when this salesman in a snooty hifi shop informed me that Martin Logans are simple to drive and will sound the same no matter what gear you use, or room you place them in. I couldn't help but break a smile. I am still not convinced that his comments were made just to get me out of his store - jeans and a t-shirt does earn you that treatment.
 
I know that this thread is about the stupidest thing that a salesguy has ever said.
But..
Invariably, when I have a pair of speakers for sale, some dimwit will always ask me "how many watts?" Duh! I'm selling a pair of speakers, not an amp dillwad!!

Hope you found this humorous. Back to the thread!
 
I was thinking about stupid things salesmen have said to me about audio, but you guys are right - simply the way customers get treated sometimes is pretty stupid too. Hasn't happened to me in a while, but when I was younger and less respectable-looking :D , it happened all the time.
 
Since a few car sales stories have crept in... I went to check out the new Pontiac Fiero when it came out. It was the first in the small NM town we lived in, so me and my car buddy were all over it. Older salesman approaches and we ask him to open it up so we can see the (mid) engine. He starts to go to the front of the car. I politely point out it's a mid-engined car, and the engine is behind the seats. Guy gets all sorts of huffy and says it's up front and continues to fiddle up there. My friend states, "$50 says the engine is behind the seats, chief."

This elder apparently didn't like being talked back to by a couple 30 year olds, and sputtered, "you're on!" After a bit more jacking around at the front of the car, he says he's going to go get the keys "to get to the hood release." Despite our protests ("Sure! Yeah, get somebody to tell you where the engine really is.") he disappears for a solid 10 minutes. Never came back, and we eventually left too. It's not even sport anymore to toy with some car salespeople.
 
In a bit of salesperson defense, I work at Wal-Mart and they don't give us any information on the products we sell. I don't know a whole lot about barbecues or lawnmowers, i'd love to be able to actually help customers if the company gave us any lit to study.

The companies are as much to blame as the salespeople.
 
I think the issue deals more with the salespeople who pretend to know what they are talking about, when they really have no idea and are just trying to make the sale.
 
Inspiribomb said:
I think the issue deals more with the salespeople who pretend to know what they are talking about, when they really have no idea and are just trying to make the sale.
Click to expand...

I agree - I don't mind someone telling me they don't know, it is the made-up or half-remembered crap voiced with great confidence that bugs me :grumpy:

Same thing with some audio reviewers, I might add.
 
Durning the mid '70s, some salesmen would try to discourage customers from buying certain brands with stupid comments like, "Keep the packaging for when you have to return it to the manufacturer for repairs", or, "Those are known to blow up!" I remember being 17 when a salesman said the later to me. I replyed, "If it blows up, why do you carry it." The look on his face was priceless.

Ron
 
Not audio related, but here's an interesting story...

There was a guy who stopped in to a downtown bank here in
my hometown and wanted his paking ticket validated.

He was dressed in a T shirt and jeans and they weren't even new
looking... he was dressed about a step or two above a bum.

The teller behind the counter refuses to validate his parking ticket.

The man stated "If you don't validate my parking ticket, I will pull all
of my money out of this bank and go bank elsewhere!"

The teller still refuses thinking "Go ahead and pull your $10 out and
stop bothering me!"

He ended up pulling out over two million dollars out of his account
and went elsewhere...

The end of the story is the teller got fired and the bank now validates
any and every parking ticket when asked to do so!

Scott
 
i was shopping for an amp for my car ...hmm ages ago now...goes something like this..
me: "can you give me a run down on this BosS amp" (cheap peice of crap)
sales person1: " yea mate, these BosE amps are great"
me: "no way, its a bose amp, theyre meant to be crazy"
saleperson1 " yea, 400watts, *random specs*, hey dave..what else has it got"
salesperson2: "its got 100 Jiggahertz of sound..."
me: " no way, 100jiggaherz, ill just pop across to the other shop to compare prices"
 
Hey Buddy, can you spare a beer?

Best line I have heard from homeless person:

"I aint gonna lie to you, I just want a dollar so I can buy a beer" :yes:

Afterall, they are salesmen too, just trying to sell you on giving them your money.
 
Best response I have heard to "How are you today?" is:
"Great, every single day is great, it's a blessing to be alive"
I like that, especially on Easter...
 
Audio Dimensions

apparently this company has several stores/locations and are one of the few audio shops in Little Rock. i was in desperate need of a rectifier tube, so i went to this supposedly high end store.. they sell Rotel, Marantz, Pioneer Elite, B&W, McIntosh, Paradigm...

me: "hi there, do you by any chance have any tubes or tube equipment"

sales guy: "tube equipment, what do you mean?"

me: "an audio tube, i need a rectifier tube"

sales guy: "you mean a TV tube"

me: "no, an audio tube, for a tube amp"

sales guy: "tube amp?"

me: "dont you sell McIntosh"

sales guy: "yes"

me: "they make tube amps"

sales guy: "never heard of them, what do they do?"

me: "provide power, ya know a vacuum tube, electron tube, tube amps"

sales guy: "sorry, never heard of them."

me: "ever read an audio magazine?" (there's several copies of TAS and Stereophile on the table nearby)

sales guy: "yeah" i open up an issue of TAS, show him a picture of a tube amp.. "try a TV store"

ahhhhhhh! ended up going to the Guitar Store and buying a Mesa Boogie Rectifier :lmao:
 
styler said:
apparently this company has several stores/locations and are one of the few audio shops in Little Rock. i was in desperate need of a rectifier tube, so i went to this supposedly high end store.. they sell Rotel, Marantz, Pioneer Elite, B&W, McIntosh, Paradigm...

me: "hi there, do you by any chance have any tubes or tube equipment"

sales guy: "tube equipment, what do you mean?"

me: "an audio tube, i need a rectifier tube"

sales guy: "you mean a TV tube"

me: "no, an audio tube, for a tube amp"

sales guy: "tube amp?"

me: "dont you sell McIntosh"

sales guy: "yes"

me: "they make tube amps"

sales guy: "never heard of them, what do they do?"

me: "provide power, ya know a vacuum tube, electron tube, tube amps"

sales guy: "sorry, never heard of them."

me: "ever read an audio magazine?" (there's several copies of TAS and Stereophile on the table nearby)

sales guy: "yeah" i open up an issue of TAS, show him a picture of a tube amp.. "try a TV store"

ahhhhhhh! ended up going to the Guitar Store and buying a Mesa Boogie Rectifier :lmao:
Click to expand...


You should have told him you were interested in one of these.
It is a current product. The reponse would have been interesting.
http://www.mcintoshlabs.com/mcprod/...at=Power+Amplifiers&prodid=1093&product=MC275
 
I have been into hifi for about five years now, and I still love walking into a new high-end shop and receiving no respect whatsoever being that I still pretty young for an audiophile. The look on the sales persons face is classic however when I end up knowing more about their products than they do, especially if it is an older or vintage piece. This one particular incident really annoyed me a few months ago when I was shopping for a pair of headphones. I called a shop about thirty minutes away to get a price on a pair of Sennheiser HD280 Pros, which were quoted at $99.95. Now being that I live on campus and my transportation situation is somewhat restricted at the moment, I went to a shop about ten minutes away thinking that they would sell the model for the same price (now just about everyone online sells these cans for $99.95 also). After arriving at the shop however, I asked if they would match a price being that their competitor sells the same model for $99.95. The salesman, a young and fairly stereotypical audiophile (snob), said "yes, we do match prices but only if you can give us some type of realistic value". Well I was not about to pay the suggested retail price of $199.95, and told him that I would just buy them at the other store. So I waited a couple days until I could get down to Fred's Sound of Music, and bought the cans for $99.95. The salesman at the other store did not even bother to look at the current going price for that model and pretty much just let me walk out the door. Would not have bothered me so much, other than it was a hassle to have to make a trip out to Freds.
 
Frys salesmoron experience

OK, I've got a car with the dreaded Bose system. Both door speakers were ruined by water damage. I took one in to Frys just to get two speakers that will fit the hole. Once I tell him it's a Bose he tells me I have to go through Bose to get a replacement since they're special powered speakers. All the while I've got the speaker in my hand. I ask him if the speaker looks like it has an amp built in? He gets all huffy and then notices the sticker that says it's 1 ohm. He calls the install department and then says that I have to go to Bose because they don't sell 1 ohm speakers. I tell him I've already been that route and well as the dealer and wrecking yards. He continues to tell me they have nothing that will work. Finally I tell him it will work, it's got to be better than what I've got. He's still PO'd and keeps mumbling that it won't work while he takes me to the aisle with the correct size speakers. He points them out and says again it won't work unless I replace my whole system and then leaves in a huff.

I buy the cheapest two way speakers that fit, the original was a full range POS BTW, thinking I can cut the tweeter wire if I have to. I put them in the car in Fry's parking lot and they sound great just as they are. Unfortunately, the saying No high. no lows must be Bose is accurate. Even in new shape they sound like an equalizer setup shaped like a hump with the mid frequencies emphasized.

At least they aren't all 'buzzy' like they were before, it actually sounds pretty good, for a Bose.
 
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