.....a front-firing sub is non-directional above 35 hz?....but, it doesn't matter if it's directional or non, if you overlap the range of the main with the sub's range, you're going to get distortion and mud....and don't just tell me I'm wrong, tell me why I'm wrong.....
I've written a number of posts about this over the years with more technical detail, so I'll try to keep this dealing with a higher level description. There are a few things going on in systems in regards to how the room interacts with speakers determined predominantly by the rooms dimensions but also by other acoustical factors. The dimensions will be the primary factors in most systems unless great care has gone into the construction of the room. In regards to the dimensions, you will have three regions. Above the frequency whose wavelength correlates with the rooms smallest dimension, frequency response is almost solely determined by the speaker. Above that frequency, all (most) rooms will sound largely the same. Below the corner frequency of the room, rooms behave similarly, as well. It's pretty easy to get smooth frequency response below the corner frequency. When you run across response graphs of subwoofers, in room, the region from 15hz up to 40-50hz is largely smooth and predictable, you'll rarely ever see any anomalies in this range. From the corner frequency up to the first range discussed is referred to as the modal region. This is where wavelengths of the music don't exceed room dimensions, they fall within the room dimensions and you'll get loads of cancelling and some of the destructive properties I believe you were referring to when you said mudiness and distortion. This is the region where distributed bass (and digital room correction) can have a profound impact on performance. In practice, this is typically 40-200hz but in smaller rooms can extend up to 300hz range. I usually focus on 40-200hz. With the distributed bass method, the intent is to add more sources of bass to the room. It overwhelms the rooms modes and smooths out the frequency response in that range. Typically, there is only one sub providing a significant amount of the output. The additional subs will have significantly lower output and only exist to wipe out some of the nulls and peaks.
The mudiness/distortion you discuss from multiple sources playing the same frequencies is absolute reality in the region above the modal region, which is why great care is take with the design in speakers that employ multiple drivers in this region but in the modal region, the room acoustics will actually cause single drivers to exhibit similar behavior that is detrimental. I don't know that this analogy is perfect, but I've often used it to help people visualize what is going on. If you have a pan of water and you move it gently back and forth, you'll get a wave that moves back and forth with very distinct peaks and nulls. If you then move it side to side, you get waves crossing each other in two directions. The result is that a distinct wave becomes a couple of less distinct waves. When you continue to add more sources of waves, you'll end up with a significant number of waves that have very little amplitude and have a smoother water surface.
I have measured probably 2 dozen rooms for friends over the years. With 2 speakers playing down into the 20-30hz range, I have yet to measure one with less than 15dB peaks and valleys in the modal range. Not one. The one that had 15dB variation in the response had a couple of bass traps and a fair amount of acoustic treatment and a couple of big windows (that actually are fairly transparent to bass regions and will help with bass smoothness). I was in a room that was purpose built from the ground up to be a listening room employing some acoustics experts in the design and even in that room, I believe the owner was still getting 7-8dB swings in response. In a number of the rooms I've measured for friends, employing distributed bass has resulted in 6-7dB variation and in one case, we got it down to 2dB variation from 40-200hz. In my own room, with cheap subs, I was able to get the variation down to 4dB from 22hz to 200hz with no peaks, and a couple of small nulls. These were using some 150.00 subwoofers I bought purely to create a thread here on the process and how it can be done inexpensively.
I have had the most success following the general guidelines put out there by Geddes. I choose one of the front corners in the room and put a subwoofer in that position that is capable of the most output and lowest frequency extension. That sub will handle about 80% of the bass duties in the room. Next, along the sidewall opposite the corner chosen, I'll add the second sub, and finally, in the back of the room, I'll add the third. In an ideal, purpose built room, the side or back sub would reside in the upper half of the room, vertically, but you can get away all of them residing all on the floor. The side and back subs aren't providing much of the output, they are intended to tackle room modes. If in the room, the modes are extremely strong and focused, purpose built bandpass subs operating in just the regions most effected can do an excellent job. Also, there is no need for the additional subs to play down into typical subwoofer territory. A woofer capable of 50-200hz range with adjustments will work wonderfully.
Finally, because multiple sources of output in the modal range is beneficial, not high passing the mains can be beneficial. Naturally, if the mains are only capable of 80hz and you are slamming them with 30hz content, obviously, that can result in all sorts of issues where a crossover would be beneficial but in a proper distributed bass system, trying to keep the speakers from overlapping is not advantageous and can be detrimental to the systems performance. Personally, my current mains play to 30-35hz or so, in room. My front subwoofer is playing from 15hz to about 80. My side subwoofer is covering from 25-150 and my rear subwoofer I believe is actually set to play to 200hz. I'd bet an awful lot of money that not a single person could detect it.
My input on this entire thread would be that you should throw out any preconceived notions about how to implement subwoofers when attempting to use distributed bass. It's intent is entirely based on resolving room issues, not speaker issues and room issues *will* exist in every one of our systems. The conventional rules about implementing subwoofers, in my experience, will always result in performance that falls short of world class.
FWIW, DRC is capable of the same benefits as Distributed Bass, but it's usually just in a position or two in the room, not necessarily throughout the entire room. Since most of us only listen from a couple of positions in our rooms, it can be a very elegant option to choose.