why can't i ever Just find a Girlfreind?

[usedto]

A dorky looking geek is sitting in a bar surrounded by hot chicks, while the young good-looking stud sat in the corner alone. When the doofus gets up to go to the john, the stud follows him in and asks, "How come a nerd like you has all them women around him, and I have none?" The geek answers, "I don't have the slightest idea. I was just sitting there licking my eyebrows...........!"

 

[speakerlust]

THAT DOES IT !!! ....

I'm going to clear this up once and for all !!! ....... :yes:

There are only two things that a guy needs to know in order to get along with women ..............





Unfortunately, no one knows what they are :lmao::lmao::lmao:

 

[alexkerhead]

Speakerlust is holding out.

A crate of puppies usually gets women's attention. No lie.

If I am out walking my pug, all da ladies are like "aww, so cute" and I say, damn right i am, then they walk away, cuz I am so fine.

 

[RaymondLeggs]

Ditch the soundesign and get a marantz...Stay unattached!! Get a good education/Lucrative career..Women are a PITA.

I do already have a marantz!

I do sit by a few girls in class but some are not single...:tears:

Maybe if I try to become freinds first It will be better..

 

[zman]

Dont be their friend too much. Girls will size you up with their talk.
Be polite but when they start dumping their baggage on you find an excuse to get away.

 

[Fedallah]

A dorky looking geek is sitting in a bar surrounded by hot chicks, while the young good-looking stud sat in the corner alone. When the doofus gets up to go to the john, the stud follows him in and asks, "How come a nerd like you has all them women around him, and I have none?" The geek answers, "I don't have the slightest idea. I was just sitting there licking my eyebrows...........!"

I'll have to save that one for a party sometime.

 

[Sandy G]

Quit looking so hard. Ask one of the girls in one of yr classes if she'd like a Coke in the campus "hangout". Start talking to a girl about one of the classes you have w/her, what a "lu-lu" the professor is, or how he seems to know what he's talking about. Look, you're a freshman, right ? You're away from home for the 1st time, its fun, but at the same time, kinda scary-Well, it is for THEM, too. Believe it or not, girls are people, too...Another thing, maybe pick out one who is not the "Campus Queen" so much. Trust yer ol' Unca Sandy, a High-Maintenance woman is NOT all that much fun after you've got over the initial "Omigawd !" of landing her. Main thing is, you're young, have fun, but remember what you're at college for-Learn Something !!...Oh, God...I sound like MY father....(Grin)

 

[Fisherdude]

Other than the obviously humorous replies, I've never read such total crap in my life.

Some honest thoughts, assuming you honestly want some advice:

...I get really nervous around girls and I have trouble with conversations around srangers and some people I do especially girls. Sometimes I will see a girl I am attracted to I will go up to her and try to talk to her but I'll freeze up and ruin everything...

This is completely normal, and will go away as you get more practice talking to girls. Just keep saying "Hi", and it will get easier.

... and tthey'll say that "they can't do this" or I have a boyfreind or that I am too old for them...

This is how a girl lets you know that they don't want to go out with you. This also happens a lot. Sometimes girls actually tell you the truth. Some already have a boyfriend. Some are too young. Not every girl will find you interesting. You won't find every girl interesting. That leaves approximately 2 billion other girls. Talk to a different one.

...I really dont want to be freinds first...I do want to try to be freinds if that's what it takes but I don't want to wait for a certain special moment so that frustrates me even more...Maybe if I try to become freinds first It will be better..

Okay, here's where you're very confused. You're SUPPOSED to be friends first. Here's your second important clue: You will find it MUCH easier to talk to girls if you talk to them as friends. That way there's no pressure on you at all. Just be friendly. As far as not wanting to wait for some "special moment", well...waiting for special moments is what makes them special. If they happened every day they wouldn't be special, would they? Get to be friends, go to a movie, get a burger, and if a special moment happens, great. If not, you saw a good movie and had a burger with a friend. What's wrong with that? You got to practice talking!

I am 18 years old ...I am kind of attracted to younger looking girls...

Girls younger than 18 are technically known as "children". That's why some of them are telling you that you're too old for them. You are. Date girls your own age, or you are going to end up in jail. If you don't find young women your own age attractive, then you need to go to a counselor who will help you understand that you are frightened by women that seem more experienced and knowledgeable than you are, and that you are turning to young girls who don't make you feel threatened. And I'm serious.

...girls of all types do want to be my freinds and thus I do talk to some girls but it is awkward to be just freinds with someone I am attracted to.

This is the most important thing you said. If girls of all types want to be friends with you, that means you're a nice guy. I would suggest you just think about what you mean by "awkward". It just means you find them attractive, and interesting, and you're nervous (and awkward!) simply because you want to keep the friendship growing, and progressing. That awkward nervousness is what makes all this exciting!!

I think your trouble is you're trying too hard. Be yourself and let them find you. I met my wife by ignoring her and it drove her crazy enough to chase me. FWIW, my father always told me the best hunters don't have to hunt.

And this quote is a perfect one to close with! You want young women to be interested in you? Stop trying so hard. Desperation is not attractive. Be friendly, don't beg. Just don't try to be too cool. It's phony. Just be yourself, be friendly, be honest and genuine, and enjoy having the jitters!

That's what makes it fun!!

 

[Fisherdude]

Other than the obviously humorous replies, I've never read such total crap in my life...

Well, except for this. Unca Sandy was typing while I was typing!

Quit looking so hard. Ask one of the girls in one of yr classes if she'd like a Coke in the campus "hangout". Start talking to a girl about one of the classes you have w/her, what a "lu-lu" the professor is, or how he seems to know what he's talking about. Look, you're a freshman, right ? You're away from home for the 1st time, its fun, but at the same time, kinda scary-Well, it is for THEM, too. Believe it or not, girls are people, too...Another thing, maybe pick out one who is not the "Campus Queen" so much. Trust yer ol' Unca Sandy, a High-Maintenance woman is NOT all that much fun after you've got over the initial "Omigawd !" of landing her. Main thing is, you're young, have fun, but remember what you're at college for-Learn Something !!...Oh, God...I sound like MY father....(Grin)

 

[Donny]

I have no real advise but there is a tv show that maybe you should check out. It's the pick up artist.

 

[speakerlust]

Speakerlust is holding out.

A crate of puppies usually gets women's attention. No lie.

If I am out walking my pug, all da ladies are like "aww, so cute" and I say, damn right i am, then they walk away, cuz I am so fine.

Your right !!! ....

I am holding out !!! .... :yes:

Truth be told, as a joke I ran this ad last year to see what kind of responses I would get, "I have no job or money, looking for girlfriend to take care of me". ..... MY GOD !!! .... I got hundreds of responses !!! .... You wouldn't believe how many were nurses ??? ..... I deleted the ad and did not respond to any of them ...... alexkerhead is right that women love puppies .... But stay away from all pet owner women .. They are used to bossing their dogs around and they'll do the same to you !!! ........ Just kidding .... one of my exe's raised Shelties and she was a really kind lady .... But if a gal owns a Pitbull ... turn and run ... What they say about dogs being like their owners is true .... :yes:....... Never lie to a woman ever ..... Except if she asks you if she looks fat ... Then lie through your teeth and tell her how light she looks .... It helps to be a good dancer .... I used to date a totally hot dance instructor and I learned as much as I could from her .... I'd go to the clubs on ladies night and have all of the women that I wanted to dance with ... I never took anyone home ... But that was by choice ... I could have taken hundreds home ... But I just wanted to dance ......

 

[saltwater]

Pickup artist, ive seen it. What i did was kind of dorky but worked. I was new to the school, (Bd school) we had a bet to see who could nail this chick first,Long story short, i was the winner, nobody paid up! I fell in love, They were like what do you think of her, really loud in the class at this point, so i said " SHE"S A HOTTY" well went silent when i said that and she heard me. SHe looked at me smilled, and i had my head down for a week at least. Then i said f it, tried walking over to her and kicked the wastebasket, on the way then i got the the desk in front of her and ran into it, gave her my number and she called said would like to see a movie, i say yeah, and does this mean were seeing each other, yes , okay by. spoiled her rotten, 6 years later, still together, went downhill from there, dont say i love you too soon either, just be mean to em and they follow! She was the only one in the class i ignored, and she was upset bout that, she hated it, but i grew some fuzzies on the patch below and went in for the kill, I dont know what the hell i just wrote but hope theres something in there that makes sence!

 

[jonman]

Get a guitar, learn to play a little, get in a band. Musicians always get laid. Most musicians are just geeks with a little talent.I played in a band for a long time and can attest you don't have to be handsome, as long as they think your cool. Look at all, the wimpy superstars there are out there with super models on their arm.

 

[speakerlust]

I am an eye guy .... I can look you in the face and know alot about you ...
... I was at the checkout once and there was this gorgeous woman with eyes so green they were like a parrot .... I told her, "Excuse me but I have to tell you this, I'm not trying to come onto you or anything, but you have the most beautiful eyes that I have ever seen. It' just seems wrong not to tell you. Sorry, I don't know, I just had to tell you" ... She glowed and graciously helped me with my order. When she was finished, she slid a piece of scratch paper over the counter to me with her phone number on it. I wasn't trying to pick her up, I just couldn't hold me tongue ..... We dated for quite awhile and ... ZOWEEE !!! .....

 

[saltwater]

nice score speakrelust!

 

[similost]

OK.. I'm not your typical AK "nerd" or what ever was implied with the "you're asking on AK"

I had more than my share of wives, girlfriend, ****buddies, and friends with bennies... I've worked in nightclubs, and been around scenes that many can only begin to wonder what it must be like... much less believe

First off.. you're young.. you have a long life a head of you.. or so lets hope...

Don't get in a hurry and try to make something happen.. If you are looking, then you won't find it... (unless as stated, you've got a hand full of cash for a one nighter) It's when you aren't looking that things happen, and you find a true romance... trust me...

Secondly.. as far as choking up.. tells em a few things. One, you are afraid of rejection,. secondly, you are afraid you aren't good enough for them, or you ware afraid you will do something wrong... There is a really great way to get over all that... Go take public speaking classes.

It will teach you to trust in yourself, gain security in your self, and will show you you're not going to mess up. I've taken a lot of public speaking, and done a fair amount, and if it wasn't for that, I would still be choking.. Now, I can walk right up to a girl or a crowd, and not even think about what to say.. It really will help you. ESPECIALLY, if you can find a class with a lot of girls or women in it.. you will find they will actually get to know you, and at least want to talk.. um.. yeah, a couple might even want more :thmbsp:

I'm going to hit here on the very last thing, that no one else has... I'm not sure if it is because of fear to say anything or what.. but I will, because I'm going to lay out the sad truth.... You are a "non white" guy, living in a southern, Midwestern state, looking to date "non black" girls... Where you live, you a really going to have a rough time, even if you do find a girl you really like. People in your part of the country don't take too lightly to that...

I've lived all over the country, and in a lot of Midwest, and southern states, and have had friends that didn't worry about inter-racial dating, but man oh man did they ever catch hell, and also had a really hard time trying to find people to date.

I really hate to be the one to have to say all this, but it is the truth, and especially for that part of the country.. Where I live in the DC area, it is very common place to see inter-racial couples, and it's pretty well accepted, but I do see a lot of people that get really rude about the states.. All too many don't think so much about you, but they always think the girl is trash, because she won't stay within "her own type" Many women realize this, and even if she really wanted to be with you, they are afraid to because of ignorant people's labels.. It really is a shame that we've come as far as we have, but yet people still have such closed minds... :nono:

I am not trying to discourage you, but just reminding you about something you seem to already realize enough to have mentioned. DO NOT BE DISCOURAGED!!!! KEEP TRYING to just get to know other women.. Even if they are purple, or green or what ever!!! :yes:

I wish you well, and I hope I have given you a few pointers on how to at least get over some of your fears, and find the self confidence you need to be able to be comfortable talking to those "SUPER HOT UNOBTAINBLE CHICKS!!!" Just take your time..

I've always found, the ones I tried hard to get, were the worst to be with.. but the ones that just happened along when I wasn't looking were the best of the best... and that's how I now have my last and final wife.. She is a one of a kind lady, and the only one that I really didn't want to become involved with, because I was sick and tired of having women try and change me to be what they wanted.. My wife is the first girl I have even known that hasn't

 

[speakerlust]

nice score speakrelust!

Thanks, Another time I was working at a gas station pumping gas
and doing the books from the previous day on the graveyard shift.
I was over 5000 dollars short !!! ...... ooooops !!! ... A beautiful
blonde came in for gas, she was dressed like she'd been out dancing.
She asked how I was doing and I told her that my numbers were 5000
dollars short. She stayed all night and helped me work on the books and
we hit it off. When a woman is that helpful to a stranger, she is probably
good people. Problem with this woman was that she was so stacked that
she went to get a breast reduction. I'm not a huge boob man ...

 

[Dynacophil]

I do already have a marantz!
I do sit by a few girls in class but some are not single...:tears:
Maybe if I try to become freinds first It will be better..

You have to learn think tactical. Be friendly to the girls. Always, but not when another one is around, but be kind and friendly with a lot of girls. they will be friendly with you sooner or later to. Yes - that may mean be friends with them... but keep them all separate. The time will come that they will trust you, and if you have a number of those you will have in future a column of possible relationships. The girls will have trouble with their boys for sure, they will suffer, or separate and think "why don't i have such a friendly guy like Raymond instead of this dork"
this is the moment she will call you. The more of the girls you have for friends the higher will be the frequency of those situations

 

[Sandy G]

So you're Black, are you ? Well, why not have Some Good Dirty Fun w/that...Like growin' a mile-high Afro, one that could support several bird nests. Then get a pre-1977 Cadillac-'77 was the year they cut 'em down DRASTICALLY in size-we don't want that. Next, get some really NASTY pimp clothes-Ones w/colors & fabric that are found nowhere in Nature. The wider the lapels & longer the collars, the better. Start affecting a sneer & a swagger-Walk like you got a stick up yer butt. Say stuff like "What it is ! Right on ! and Be Cool, fool !" a lot. And "Raymond"? Oh, son, that's GOTTA go. You are now Theotis Richard "Cornpone" Johnson, 111, but you're known to all the Foxy Mamas as "Big Dick". Oh, and learn to LOVE the soundtrack from such cinematic gems as "Superfly", "Shaft", "Foxy Brown", for starters. You do all this, & I'll guarantee you'll be picked up. Prolly by the Vice Squad, but you'll be picked up, all right...And I hope all y'all got as big a kick readin this diatribe as I did makin' it up...

 

[Fedallah]

And I hope all y'all got as big a kick readin this diatribe as I did makin' it up...

He'll either bust a gut laughing or he'll be offended. I predict/hope for the former.

Actually, I enjoy the soundtrack from Superfly. I was weaned on a steady mixture of soul music and classic rock as a child.