Good for you and good luck! :thmbsp:
Sobriety, something new for me...
- Thread starter Mister Tawny
- Start date
You just made one of the best decisions of your life. Whenever you need to talk, just log on. Somebody will be here.:yes:
Saints27
Active Member
Excellent advice here - but I have to agree with you about AA. Did nothing for me.
I grew up in a consuming culture, where drinking was as natural as breathing, and it was tough to reprogram myself. Realize how much better you feel waking up sober vs. how awful it felt to wake up every day with a hangover.
As a newspaper / freelance writer, I thought 'using' helped my creativity; in reality, it was the furthest thing from the truth. You'll discover your own truths in sobriety.
But make no mistake - sometimes it will just plain suck. Good luck, mon frere.
I grew up in a consuming culture, where drinking was as natural as breathing, and it was tough to reprogram myself. Realize how much better you feel waking up sober vs. how awful it felt to wake up every day with a hangover.
As a newspaper / freelance writer, I thought 'using' helped my creativity; in reality, it was the furthest thing from the truth. You'll discover your own truths in sobriety.
But make no mistake - sometimes it will just plain suck. Good luck, mon frere.
Arkay
Lunatic Member
Congratulations on a very tough decision. I've never fought the alcohol addiction, but have had close friends who became alcoholics and fought their demons, and I've dealt with allergy-addictive food issues. No real addiction is easy to beat, but the "one day at a time" and even "one minute at a time" approach really does make it easier.
I'd recommend that you add a lot of fresh, raw and cooked vegetables to your diet, especially things that support the liver, like beetroot (beets). The nutrients in those veggies will help your body's systems to handle the adjustments and detoxification issues that come with withdrawal, and make it easier to get through. You might not feel much like eating any of that "good stuff", but trust me --it IS what you need and WILL make the process easier.
Sweating in a sauna may help, too (regular or, perhaps even better, the far-infrared type).
Regular slow, deep breathing may help.
Get busy with something positive, something interesting and/or something that improves your life. Get that garage shelf cleaned off, or the floor swept, or the porch railings painted, or whatever. The more positive change you can make in your life and surroundings, the more it will uplift and motivate you to continue making other (and tougher) positive changes, like staying sober. Get your life going on "an upward spiral".
You are now a guy who USED TO drink, and no longer a drinker. Now you drink water and healthful stuff. Get used to it. See yourself that way, and the way you WANT to be, instead of the way you used to be. We tend to live up to our inner "self image", most of the time.
Get outdoors and get some fresh air. Spend some time in a park or in the mountains or at a lake or somewhere... where there isn't any alcohol, of course. Let nature "cleanse" your body, mind and spirit, and rejuvenate you.
Remind yourself of all the benefits of your new lifestyle. More energy. More productivity. Better relationships with loved ones. A "you" whom you can feel more proud of. A chance to save a lot of money you used to squander on alcohol, and can now squander on better stuff (like audio gear!
).
In fact, it would be a good idea to sit down and list out --by hand, with a pen-- every single benefit of staying sober: list every reason you can think of, and add to it whenever you think of something else to add, no matter how trivial some things may seem. Read over the list every morning when you wake up, and every night before you sleep, until it has really seeped deep into your psyche.
Try to avoid temptation. Get rid of any and all alcohol in your house. Stay away from the environments in which you used to drink. Avoid bars and old friends who will push you to have "just one" (Addiction LOVES company!). If all your friends were drinkers, go make some new friends who are not drinkers, and who will support you in your efforts to remain sober.
If you feel tempted to backslide, come here and ask for help -- even if no one is physically with you, you at least know you have a lot of AK friends around really rooting for you to succeed! Sometimes just taking time to do something (like posting on AK) is enough to get past a bout of temptation. Usually those weak moments of craving are transient.
GOOD LUCK! :thmbsp:
I'd recommend that you add a lot of fresh, raw and cooked vegetables to your diet, especially things that support the liver, like beetroot (beets). The nutrients in those veggies will help your body's systems to handle the adjustments and detoxification issues that come with withdrawal, and make it easier to get through. You might not feel much like eating any of that "good stuff", but trust me --it IS what you need and WILL make the process easier.
Sweating in a sauna may help, too (regular or, perhaps even better, the far-infrared type).
Regular slow, deep breathing may help.
Get busy with something positive, something interesting and/or something that improves your life. Get that garage shelf cleaned off, or the floor swept, or the porch railings painted, or whatever. The more positive change you can make in your life and surroundings, the more it will uplift and motivate you to continue making other (and tougher) positive changes, like staying sober. Get your life going on "an upward spiral".
You are now a guy who USED TO drink, and no longer a drinker. Now you drink water and healthful stuff. Get used to it. See yourself that way, and the way you WANT to be, instead of the way you used to be. We tend to live up to our inner "self image", most of the time.
Get outdoors and get some fresh air. Spend some time in a park or in the mountains or at a lake or somewhere... where there isn't any alcohol, of course. Let nature "cleanse" your body, mind and spirit, and rejuvenate you.
Remind yourself of all the benefits of your new lifestyle. More energy. More productivity. Better relationships with loved ones. A "you" whom you can feel more proud of. A chance to save a lot of money you used to squander on alcohol, and can now squander on better stuff (like audio gear!
). In fact, it would be a good idea to sit down and list out --by hand, with a pen-- every single benefit of staying sober: list every reason you can think of, and add to it whenever you think of something else to add, no matter how trivial some things may seem. Read over the list every morning when you wake up, and every night before you sleep, until it has really seeped deep into your psyche.
Try to avoid temptation. Get rid of any and all alcohol in your house. Stay away from the environments in which you used to drink. Avoid bars and old friends who will push you to have "just one" (Addiction LOVES company!). If all your friends were drinkers, go make some new friends who are not drinkers, and who will support you in your efforts to remain sober.
If you feel tempted to backslide, come here and ask for help -- even if no one is physically with you, you at least know you have a lot of AK friends around really rooting for you to succeed! Sometimes just taking time to do something (like posting on AK) is enough to get past a bout of temptation. Usually those weak moments of craving are transient.
GOOD LUCK! :thmbsp:
Ausjoe
Super Member
As already stated, take it one day at a time. Hell one minute at a time. Learn to be yourself, whoever that is and not some persona presented to the world. In that lies happiness. Meanwhile it might be helpful to learn alternative ways to relax. Meditation for example. When you might have normally started drinking go for a walk. I wish you luck. Yesterday's over. Today is the first day of the rest of your life!
elgato8905
Nobody special.
Congrats on your 3 days sir!!! I've been sober (mostly drugs though) for around ten years. I was a hardcore addict for almost 15 years. When I did get sober I went through a rehabilitation program. With that came the whole AA thing. I couldn't stand going to AA meetings and ducked and dodged going to them as much as I could so I know what you're talking about when you say they're not working for you. I still feel the same way about them ten years later and have not been to one meeting outside of rehab. Regardless of what a lot of people such as councilors, judges, doctors and other people in the program will tell you it is most definitely NOT for everyone. I will say this though... What is important is to be around people who want to stay sober and it helps a lot if they are struggling with some of the same things you are. Me and all of my AA outcast friends from rehab are still really good friends to this day and I would say that's been the single most important thing for all of us. Some of them go to meetings and some don't.... Some of them fall off the wagon and some don't... But regardless we're all here for each other and understand each others indiscretions and day to day struggle completely which has been a big deal in all of our lives.
So I would say to surround yourself with people who are sober and who are trying to get sober as much as possible whether it's in the AA community or not. Also a good plan of working out and eating right will do wonders for the way you feel without the alcohol and drugs. It also helps to remember all of the bad places that the alcohol took you. Also for some strange reason it helped me to know that I could just try sobriety out for a 6 or 7 months and if things didn't get better that I could always go back to what I was doing if I wanted to. Having started that way ten years ago I really have no urge to go back to my old lifestyle even a little bit. I'm still the same person I was when I was getting high... Just without the drugs.
Good luck to you sir!!!
-Greg-
So I would say to surround yourself with people who are sober and who are trying to get sober as much as possible whether it's in the AA community or not. Also a good plan of working out and eating right will do wonders for the way you feel without the alcohol and drugs. It also helps to remember all of the bad places that the alcohol took you. Also for some strange reason it helped me to know that I could just try sobriety out for a 6 or 7 months and if things didn't get better that I could always go back to what I was doing if I wanted to. Having started that way ten years ago I really have no urge to go back to my old lifestyle even a little bit. I'm still the same person I was when I was getting high... Just without the drugs.
Good luck to you sir!!!
-Greg-
ekmanning5
Time has told me...
You're right, AA isn't for everyone. but in the early stages of sobriety it can be, quite literally, a lifesaver. I'm sure Oakland has a ton of meetings. I know Chicago does. Look for one that suits YOU. Make it your home meeting and give it a chance for a few months. See if there is someone there that impresses you with their approach to sobriety and ask them to be your sponser. There are situations that come up in sobriety that we may not know how to handle. It helps to have someone to be a sounding board. Don't worry, about rejection, whoever you ask most likely will say yes, at least on a temporary basis. Remember that anger, fatigue, and loneliness are your enemies. Lastly, you have friends here, and in the real world you can turn to. Don't be afraid to ask for help. Congratulations and Good Luck.
chadnliz
Addicted Member
If you were a hard drinker than its very likely that at times you did some things you regret from possible DUI charges, treating folks badly, drunken clumsy and costly accidents and such. Find strength from not wanting to repeat those mistakes but also forgive yourself so you dont get down and trigger a drink. Some folks are just prone to addiction and it is just a matter of how it manifests itself. For some its drink, others drugs, some gamble, some eat too much, some even shopping or dare I say "SCORES".
Learn your triggers and find out how to best distract yourself, music, exercise, cleaing, car repair, puzzles or whatever just get the monkey off your back. Your not alone and I admire your effort, also forgive yourself if you slip up and try to jump right back on wagon.
Learn your triggers and find out how to best distract yourself, music, exercise, cleaing, car repair, puzzles or whatever just get the monkey off your back. Your not alone and I admire your effort, also forgive yourself if you slip up and try to jump right back on wagon.
beans
Got arth-a-ritis
You may want to find a clinic that specializes in detox services. They can work with you by asking you about the nature of your "habit(s)", assess your health and sleeping habits, and prescribe medication to relieve any suffering from withdrawal.
If you have come up in a Christian family and belong to a church now, or at least open to the Christian life, then Celebrate Recovery is the best thing you can do. It is 12-step, but is specifically designed around Christianity. I am doing it and have learned a lot... but I need to work harder on it.
If you have come up in a Christian family and belong to a church now, or at least open to the Christian life, then Celebrate Recovery is the best thing you can do. It is 12-step, but is specifically designed around Christianity. I am doing it and have learned a lot... but I need to work harder on it.
Naptown Rob
Ponographer
This is becoming apparent to me. We are many & varied, & we sure as hell ain't a glum lot!
hatrack71
distracted by everything
Not trying to sound clinical or anything but the main thing that worked for me was getting outside of myself and selfishness and volunteering in my community to help others. The other thing was to not hang around any old using friends as I would always fall back into relapse. New activities and new sober acquaintences are the thing for me. I have a little over 6 months now and look at it a day at a time.
mulester7
LIVE from Lake Ouachita
.....a quality decision you should stick with, MT, come whatever....that same decade of hard drinking was the main contributing factor that took my father at 52, and my brother at 45.....
