Twisted Definitions

[Joewag]

Canopies: a good addition to your stockpile of non perishable foods for the coming apocalypse.

 

[bobsvinyl]

Jacuzzi: what Jack’s wife asks when she doesn’t know someone at a get together.

Jacuzzi- Jack Black buys an Israeli machine gun.

 

[Joewag]

Socialist: a compendium of various fundraisers and debutante balls coming up.

 

[bobsvinyl]

Bravado- When you drive a Toronado with low brake fluid.

 

[Joewag]

Support: generic name for a type of dinner wine.

 

[Joewag]

Heirloom: device for making weaves and wigs.

 

[Joewag]

Functioning: avoiding George Clinton.

 

[Joewag]

Parliament: small candy placed in receiving rooms to freshen the breath of suitors.

 

[bobsvinyl]

Pariah- A jerk who cheats on his golf scorecard and no one will play with him.

 

[noogies]

Salmonella: the story of a young spawning fish who, although inhibited in her quest by her evil stepmother fish, overcomes obstacles to go to the Princefish’s falls where she meets her hairy godmother, who eats her. Yeah…it’s grizzly.

2. That annoying couple next door who are always bickering.

 

[Joewag]

Haggard: a protective witch’s familiar

 

[Joewag]

Priceless: how I felt when my favorite horror star, Vincent, passed away

 

[Joewag]

Mardi Gras: what my father would yell at me while he was brushing his teeth. I often let it get too long.

 

[SuperjazzyJa]

Superbowl - a nocturnal bird that is better than the rest

One smurfphone I had always tried to space superbowl so that it read "superb owl".

 

[old_tv_nut]

Victrola - a guy named Victor who causes trouble in the forums.

 

[Joewag]

Investigation: the required research necessary before buying market stock.

 

[Joewag]

Regulatory: British party member with consistent movements.

 

[Joewag]

Considerate: it’s always possible that you’re mistaken.

 

[Joewag]

Mistake: a wavering vegan.

 

[Joewag]

Wafer: comparative preposition indicating time passage. As in “She was a wafer nine months”. Nothing suspicious there.