I'm Coming Out
- Thread starter savatage1973
- Start date
savatage1973
Addicted Member
It's hard to put into words, but when you throw it out there on the table, it is what it is and no one can change that. Sure, things would be "easier" if I wasn't married to a man and my sister wasn't married to a black man--and yes, I will forever refer to him as a black man--he is African, not African-American, and he will correct you on that one because he is more racist than I ever was. Oh well, ask any accountant--figures lie and liars figure--my ex-wife of three years is an IRS revenue agent in the criminal fraud division, and I paid for her law degree--no regrets. She is married with three beautiful children, and we still talk almost 40 years later.
mfrench
Addicted Member
whatever.
I'm more interested in your cool toys. I think I love you because of those.
Me:
Raised Mormon (reluctantly, and, rebelliously from age 4,).
I probably don't need to explain much about that, other than to say that I came away from that experience blindly homophobic, until I met my wife (now of 41 years), and she introduced me to Phil. She and Phil essentially grew up together. Phil, to directly quote him; Queer as a three dollar bill.
Phil changed my views of this so far, in a completely drastically opposite direction, that I cannot begin to suggest the impact. We became deep friends, in so far as life trusting circumstances involved in extreme outback skiing of mountain peaks and chutes where we climbed and then skied in wild terrain. A screwup by either of us, and lives would change beyond the two of us. We did these tours all around Utah, and, Cal.
Phil didn't survive the early AIDS epidemic. We miss him dearly.
I'm more interested in your cool toys. I think I love you because of those.
Me:
Raised Mormon (reluctantly, and, rebelliously from age 4,).
I probably don't need to explain much about that, other than to say that I came away from that experience blindly homophobic, until I met my wife (now of 41 years), and she introduced me to Phil. She and Phil essentially grew up together. Phil, to directly quote him; Queer as a three dollar bill.
Phil changed my views of this so far, in a completely drastically opposite direction, that I cannot begin to suggest the impact. We became deep friends, in so far as life trusting circumstances involved in extreme outback skiing of mountain peaks and chutes where we climbed and then skied in wild terrain. A screwup by either of us, and lives would change beyond the two of us. We did these tours all around Utah, and, Cal.
Phil didn't survive the early AIDS epidemic. We miss him dearly.
heckfire, uncle Brigham, is well, my uncle (insert a # of greats or course). I am not a member but that is not for lack or trying on their part, I guess bringing a blood line into the fold gets you 40 cents gas points or a new toaster or something!
Referencing post 124 above...I recall circa 99-00 flying into SFO...I was with VISA at the time and flew either United (in house travel) or tower air (military wet lease that ran pass-ops in down time - 747s only) as we got a bonus if we saved travel $$, $180 rt/ JFK-SFO was a KILLER deal, anyways
I came out of terminal 3 one day after flying out and this was pre-9/11 when people could greet you at the gate...there were 2 guys who fit the entire GQ stereotpye for SF - clearly gay - walking past hand in hand beaming like they just got awarded their own airplane for christmas, WITH a free tank of fuel. and it struck me as in I literally said to myself '****, those two are about as clear a definition of happy as you can find' I never really had much of a prejudice before (my office mate at IBM prior was in the 'alliance' as local steward at IBM that secured same sex bennies - first publicly traded corp in the US!) but from that point on any tolerance of prejudice was banished forever. most people would give a left one (breast, nut) to be that happy.
prejudicial discrimination is just, for a lack of better word - dumb.
now if you excuse me, I am going to fire up bertha and listen to the 701/IIs hooked to it
Djcoolray
Addicted Member
It’s a great thing to be supportive of one another but, you don’t need other people’s acceptance to feel good about who you are. But, it takes guts to be openly honest about breaking free from what groups of people designate as being the norm. There are many loners on this site that prefer working on things, owning things, hording things, enjoying music over interaction with people and that is beyond the norm. But being normal is highly overrated....
So Confucius say, “He who live in glass house......better not throw rocks !”
AK is the glass house that we all live in....
So Confucius say, “He who live in glass house......better not throw rocks !”
AK is the glass house that we all live in....
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confucius also say: "fly who sits on toilet seat usually gets pissed off'
mfrench
Addicted Member
If I may,... a story that relates music, stereo systems, G.Dead, and, lifestyles...
I'm a Dead concert taper, from the day of, well, analog tape.
My wife, Sarge, she was deeply involved in the gay community, because of Phil, and, his friends. They'd do the Hollywood dance club thing, party, blah blah,...
Sarge, she ended up being a grocery checker at a small union shop in Laguna Beach, right in the heart of downtown Laguna Beach. She is extremely flamboyant, and, got to know just about everyone in town. They wanted her to be the honorary mayor of Laguna Beach. If you're not familiar with the reputation of Laguna Beach, espceially at that time, is that of a notoriously gay town; 'Frisco south.
In all of that, she met Chuck and Charlie, a devoted couple (this being mid-80's). Chuck and Charlie were dedicated DeadHeads.
Sarge told them of my recordings, and, they being Heads, wanted to get closer to the master source, as analog generational loss was problematic for fidelity. They asked if I might come by with my tapes of the last concert run at Irvine Meadows, and, I said, sure. They said they'd have a few friends by, who would also like to get in on the loop. Not a problem.
I get there, and, the house was packed. It was a full blown G.Dead party, and, something that I never knew existed, all gay DeadHeads, men and women. And, they were rigged extremely well for tape duplication! They had so many cassette decks strung together, and, a team of folk there monitoring every second of it, getting the flips just right, balancing levels, blah blah.
All I had to do was sit back, and try to keep up with the consumption that was going on all around me [coughes] and being pushed in my direction.
These GD taping parties at C&C's house became the norm after the SoCal concert runs, up until 1990, when I'd finally had enough of the tour, and, found my way into other genre.
My contact with this community served me very well, as we'd gather in an area that was referred to as the FOB area, or Front of Board, where the sound mix was focused. They'd help form a quiet zone of bodies that would surround us, and assist in getting recodings without the associated screamng and talking. It was a wonderful symbiotic relationship.
Djcoolray
Addicted Member
Yah...
I remember the San Francisco Bay Area back in the seventies when no one cared about another persons sexual preference and didn’t care about a persons ethnic background. The Silicon Valley was diverse and open to like minded people of all origins. Then corporate globalization happened.....
I remember the San Francisco Bay Area back in the seventies when no one cared about another persons sexual preference and didn’t care about a persons ethnic background. The Silicon Valley was diverse and open to like minded people of all origins. Then corporate globalization happened.....
RobRoy
It's just stuff - but fun
True, but that particular part of the american culture was not all that diverse back then, compared to now. I was there.
RobRoy
It's just stuff - but fun
You should never be ashamed of who you are. We are all beautifully and wonderfully created. I am, from time to time, however, aware that I have done things that are harmful to myself or others.
But that is about what I do, not who I am. Good people do bad things and bad people do good things. Hitler liked dogs.
savatage1973
Addicted Member
Nope--you see my avatar. He'll be 2 years old June 26th--my parents 62nd anniversary. He was flown in from Germany, and I had to pick him up at the Cleveland airport--and he has better medical records than I do. I'm just a "mutt"--he's got papers out the a**., and I love him dearly. My three prior dogs are all on my mantle in urns with their collars and tags--I owed that to them--two Dobermans and one GSD. It sucks that they don't live as long as we do.
But anyone with Bose--we still hate you!!! Just joking--get over it!
RobRoy
It's just stuff - but fun
I think that Bose thing is something we can ALL agree on! I used to sell them in the 70's. and my brother got one of those Bose home theater systems. Just awful - for the price.
My other brother uses professional Bose headsets in his Cessna Citation. I've been in the cockpit and used them. They are truly amazing, but I have no idea if they are also overpriced.
Congrats on integrating more of your life into one big consistent ball of happiness.
70's Rockfan
Rough N Ready
David_NC
Super Member
I moved to OC almost six years ago, and it's amazing at how Laguna Beach was back in the day. Your account of it is the same as every other I've heard from gay and straight friends. There's still one bar there, and another opens once every year or so for Pride. As much as I like Laguna, I'd have totally enjoyed it back then, sigh....
I reluctantly feel the need to "come out". I have a pair of Bose (151s - outdoor speakers) but haven't had them connected to any system in over three years.
I hope society has progressed enough that none of you will judge me.
PS I hear that 301s and 601s are worth a listen. And I long for the day when one's sexual orientation is any business but your own.
I hope society has progressed enough that none of you will judge me.
PS I hear that 301s and 601s are worth a listen. And I long for the day when one's sexual orientation is any business but your own.