Write a Limerick

[musichal]

I had myself quite a huge scare
confronting a large grizzly bear.
He gave me a swat
and I died on the spot,
and buried myself right there.

 

[bobsvinyl]

I've found that I'm a very bad liar
I get nervous tics and I perspire.
By stating a fact
you show off your tact
and the end results aren't as dire.

 

[musichal]

She asked for an F-type connector,
but the sales-clerk sought to correct her.
"What you need is a PAL."
She said, "Stop it now,
your sweet talk won't gather my nectar."

 

[harman/kardon]

Seven long months of horrible drought
Are over, I actually almost thought
It will never end.
Rain prayers not sent,
But now sending thanks to the Lord.

 

[old_tv_nut]

There once was a lady from Dover
Who thought that her love life was over.
But then came the time
She learned a new rhyme
And found a new lover from Plover.

 

[Jody Thornton]

It's time this thread get some praise,
It's been ignored for the last thirty days.
I was saddened to see,
It slipped to Page Three,
Let's reignite this limerick craze.

 

[Poultrygeist]

Had I more time
I would try for some rhymes
But to work I must go
With bag lunch in tow
I still have to earn a few dimes

 

[DonQuixote99]

There isn't a doubt in my mind
That limericks are finer than fine
You do not need school
Or poetic tools
Just find words that more or less rhyme.

 

[dyche01]

I feared that the man from Nantucket
Had kicked the proverbial bucket.
I am happy to learn
That the limerick returns.
Let us all vow never to chuck it!

 

[Poultrygeist]

I feared that the man from Nantucket
Had kicked the proverbial bucket.
I am happy to learn
That the limerick returns.
Let us all vow never to chuck it!

I bet you also know the x-rated Nantucket version

 

[old_tv_nut]

Here is the news on my foot.
It seems to me to be "sehr gut."
But an X-ray is necessary
Come early February
To prove I'm a healed-up old coot.

 

[bobsvinyl]

There once was a man named Lime Eric.
Puns and wordplay made him rather sick.
He couldn't stand silly rhymes,
they wasted his precious time
And he just went on being a dick.

 

[bobsvinyl]

@old_tv_nut :

I sure hope that your sore foot mends up fast
and all your problems are left in the past.
You can kick up your heels
and let out some squeals
when you can boogie and breakdance at last.

 

[old_tv_nut]

We've dropped to the end of page two,
So what can a limericker do?
Since I am too dense,
Write a verse with no sense.
A good one, I leave up to you.

 

[Imprecise]

There once was a young lass named Ellie
Who loved to read Byron and Shelley
She'd spend all of her time
To get things to rhyme
But her poetry’s really quite smelly

 

[old_tv_nut]

There was a young lady named Sally
Who learned belly dancing in Bali.
She was all the rave
With the shows that she gave,
Wriggling opening to writhing finale.

 

[Jody Thornton]

I think for today, I am done
listening to discs I had spun

So I spent a little time
to come up with a rhyme

Oh look, we're back to page one

 

[old_tv_nut]

This thread was deficient in buoyancy
Til Jody said "Let me just toy and see
How to write something fun
That will rise to page one
For subsequent readers' enjoyancy."

 

[Jody Thornton]

Is "enjoyancy" really a word?
It's not one that I've ever heard

I've searched every place,
to see if there's a case

if ever it was spoken or slurred

 

[DonQuixote99]

When practicing comic poeticy
New words are a frequent necessity
It simplifies rhyme
So have a good time
And disregard Webster's upsetency.