Write a Limerick

[harman/kardon]

"Horse sounded hoarse, it really was coarse,
So let loose round the track to run true,
But the poor old nag,
Returned a bit of a hag,
But still holds his own in quality glue."

(bogle111)

 

[oldgringo]

Do Not Use

The first mate, O'Higgins
He said he had a big 'un
Wrapped it fast
Around the mast
And used the rest for rigging!

"The Good Ship Venus" is not a Limerick, mate...

Just like - [Definitely] Do Not Use:

Mary had a little lamb,
She kept it in a bucket;
But every time the lamb got out,
The Bulldog used to bite it.

End of DNU

Cheers, og

 

[Rome]

The door was opened without hesitation,
When I saw her it caused a stirring sensation,
Before I could speak,
She said "You want to come in for a quick peek,"
To my surprise she opened the bible & led me to salvation.

Rome

 

[bobsvinyl]

A man and his friend placed bets around,
that soon there would be snow on the ground.
His buddies paid out money,
it was June, hot and sunny,
Then the friend, Mike Snow laid himself down.

 

[BigElCat]

A limerick that's not obscene,
is both tasteful and serene.
Without the coarse jesting,
or the verbal molesting,
it's almost a waste of the screen.

(((bring on the hookers)))

 

[harman/kardon]

"Race fell from grace, I couldn't keep pace,
Now by myself I just jogs,
I may survive to the last,
If I don't run too fast,
But first a drink may just loosen some cogs."

(bogle111)

 

[saunadog]

Just had dinner. An ode to my favorite condiment:

Oh how I love Hine's 57!
The taste it reminds me of heaven
It's savory and sweet,
And so good on meat,
um...I wish that my name was Kevin

(last line was hard, I couldn't come up with another work that rhymed)

 

[dcmfan]

Do Not Use


"The Good Ship Venus" is not a Limerick, mate...

...
End of DNU

Cheers, og

Accused I am of stealing
A rhyme with prurient appealing.
I swear on the light
(and to Mr Wainwright)
I have done no such double dealing!

(at least per the lyrics I checked...)

 

[old_tv_nut]

When eating spaghetti I flirt
With getting sauce dripped on my shirt.
To eat it much faster
And still skirt disaster
An over-sized bib couldn't hurt.

 

[old_tv_nut]

When the chilis have such heat
That you hesitate to eat
And steam comes out of your ears
Cool them with a couple o' beers
And you'll never taste defeat.

 

[RuffzGuts]

The Music fills my bones with cheer

As I twist the lid off another beer

I would like a few more

Though its likely ide snore

And wake up with the dog in the morning.

 

[harman/kardon]

"You name the brand, it'll be in your hand,
And we'll all eat a hearty big roast,
In the morning feel bad,
On the booze that we had,
And to my wife my name will be toast."

(bogle111)

 

[bobsvinyl]

I stopped smoking in seventy-four.
Quitting cigarettes was quite a chore.
I ended up snacking,
but no longer hacking
and the cost now would have made me poor.

 

[mulester7]

Well, you can't roller skate in a buffalo herd,
or at least the song says so in a definitive word,
watch out for the horns,
your flesh could be torn,
and try not to slip on a turd.

 

[SuperjazzyJa]

Most of the posts on page 6 don't really qualify as limericks. Just saying.....

 

[Christian B]

I seem to have gotten a hunch
Tho usually I’m out to lunch
Bob’s thread is quite timely
The waits over finally
Its National Poetry Month

 

[bobsvinyl]

It is sure a real pain to make rhymes.
It's tough to find the right match sometimes.
You decide that you're jinxed
the whole effort just stinks
and can only be performed by mimes.

 

[old_tv_nut]

Some say that a limerick is awful,
And some say it should be unlawful.
But in writing, my plan is
To show that's
It's just aimed to make you go ROFL.

 

[harman/kardon]

Most of the posts on page 6 don't really qualify as limericks. Just saying.....

Most of them? I hope that Pete's do.

"Embrace your date before it's too late,
Or you'll be filled with regret and mirth,
I don't mean the girl,
With that rather cute curl,
I'm referring to the year of your birth."

(bogle111)

 

[mulester7]

Had supper at a cheap Chinese,
where a ceiling fan caused me to freeze,
the boiled shrimp were great,
with a sauce that did rate,
and I'm glad their cuisine has no cheese.